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Moody

Losses and messes

Hasn't been the easiest past couple of weeks. Nothing awful in the scheme of things; just a steady stream of losses and messes, departures and FUBAR situations to adapt to and/or correct as best I can. On the surface, nearly none of these have been the result of my choices, nor have they been personal. The latter quality, however, has an often-unrecognized cutting edge—sometimes I wish relationship would affect choices more than it does, and it's sad and/or frustrating when that seems less of a factor than I'd like.

Losses and messes. Saying good-bye and cleaning up. Can't recall a day in the past couple of weeks when one or both of these weren't dominant themes, and I'm having a tough time with it. On the other hand, none of us has been promised anything else, and I can hardly count myself among either the persecuted or the suffering. Feeling sorry for myself just has rotten results, which isn't something I or anyone around me needs. "Weary" is a more apt description. And I don't like not being strong or gracious enough to absorb or deflect it all in stride.

I'm thankful to follow a King who invites the weary and heavy-laden to come to Him for rest—I guess I just don't want to be this weary and heavy-laden. But I am. And I don't know what rest looks like from the losses and messes. He's going to have to show me.

Comments

Of Losses and Messes

To know you feel such things is comforting. So many of us go along happily unaffected by the losses and messes you refer to. We're connected and I remain hopeful due to ours.