Maximillian Amadeus Banzai (banzai) wrote,
Maximillian Amadeus Banzai
banzai
  • Mood: tired

A little toasty

Hitting some burnout issues with work. I've been doing 2.5 jobs for three years now and I'm not sure how long I can keep up that pace. It's definitely a matter of cumulative effect rather than some major crisis event. Talked with Michael and John about it some yesterday, but need to have some more conversations. Perhaps ironically, even taking the time out to talk about it put me far enough behind that I'll need to work part of today, too. Tonight's also our staff Christmas dinner, which is cruddy timing for me. More time with work-related stuff, even with a job and church I'm blessed to have, isn't something I want very much. Sunday is also more full than average with Christmas events, so the rest of the week is a bit of a haul.

Good time with the Andrewses and Annette last night, even though I had to swallow my resistance and resentment toward another church-related time commitment. That's easier for me to work past with them, because I know from experience that once I'm there, I'm usually glad. And I suspect that's part of the answer: I need relationships that don't figuratively and literally feel like work. I can do some things to make that possible, but it's also a matter of waiting on, hoping in, and trusting God. I haven't even been asking Him for that, or for much of anything in regard to the whole issue. Stubborn, stubborn, stubborn.
Tags: friends, hope, struggle, work
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