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Eustace undragoned

The Father disciplines those He loves, and I am starting to feel the burn—not deep suffering so much as the fire and ache of atrophied muscles that aren't being allowed to sit idle any longer. The weight would surely crush me, however, without His tender mercy and the hope of His promises.

I'm surprised by how much (and how quickly) He's changing my sensibilities. The areas He's hit today:
  • Money: The ways I've been a rotten steward, the debt I've mounted, what it's going to cost me to put that behind me, and how important it is to do better from here forward.
  • Work: How far burnout has crept in, how little I've done about it, how deeply I need relationships that call for me to be something beyond a fixit guy and answer man, how much being a servant costs.
  • Entertainment: Keeping myself distracted has lost its appeal, as have many of the methods I've been using to do so. I've filled some of the empty spaces with garbage, and they need to cleared if I am to have room for things that are truly valuable and beautiful.
In short, I find myself beginning to repent in the most unexpected ways, driven by how He's reshaping my heart. I'm called to live my life in line with how He's changing me, which makes the choices and sacrifices ahead so clearly worthwhile. These are momentary light afflictions in light of the joy He's set before me. I am Eustace being undragoned by Aslan.

Today was exhausting, honestly. It's not what I'd have chosen for myself. But late in the day, I opened a letter reminding me that one of my former students has completed her time on staff with InterVarsity and is focusing on building a life with her new husband. As I thought about it, so many other dear ones' faces and names came to mind, each now grown and facing up to the challenges of living into their lives. My little trees have indeed grown up. Perhaps it is time for me to do the same.

Comments

I love your subject line. Long live C.S. Lewis :)
1. One of my favorite scenes in all of Narnia.

2. Reading Jeremiah these days. I keep being amazed at God's mercy. Such a comfort to know He hasn't changed.

3. It's not what I'd have chosen for myself. So glad He knows better than to give me what I would choose for myself. Now we see through a glass darkly.

:o]
1. :o]

2. I'm just finishing up Jeremiah now.

3. Yes, absolutely. I look forward to seeing face to face.
I'm actually reading the Chronicles of Narnia for the first time, so I loved your subject line. Top 3 scene no doubt, but my personal preference is the scene where Prince Rillian, Scrubb, Pole, and Puddlegum are being enchanted by the witch. One of the clearest images one can have about Satan's tactics in this world.

"Safe? Of course he's not safe, but he's good."

Anthony
You've also done your IV tour of duty—small world!

One of my friends loves that book so much that she named her daughter Rilian (with one "L" instead of two, since it's a girl).

Are you in/near Chicago? I'm taking some vacation there soon and looking for ideas on things to do...
I am in Chicago. Tell me what you're looking for, I can probably help you find something that'll fit.

You did IV, huh? What school?

Anthony
I was on volunteer staff at Central College for a few years. My friend Sarah (who I mentioned in this entry) just wrapped up at University of Central Florida and Rollins College.

I'll shoot you an email soon re: Chicago if the email in your profile is good.
Go with LAGiron at gmail dot com.

Anthony
The Silver Chair, yup, it's my favorite of the Narnia series. I'm about to dive into The Magician's Nephew tonight. Blah blah. ;-)
Oops, thought I was replying to the comment about the girl named Rilian. :-)