Maximillian Amadeus Banzai (banzai) wrote,
Maximillian Amadeus Banzai

  • Mood:

The whole world in His hands

Underground at the café of The Elliott Bay Book Company, drinking the day's first coffee at noon. Was in the office this morning, but will spend much of the rest of the day in the city, precipitated by a necessary visit to the IRS for work (as long as I can get the form I'm looking for, no one needs to get hurt). This is one of my favorite places, if all too rarely visited. The buzz of the Pioneer Square lunch crowd has begun.

I wish I could be out in the city more often. I absolutely love it.

Not feeling so hot, and may raincheck for Community Group tonight. It's an interview night, so it's even easier to proceed without me. Almost as if there's a plan or something...

Yesterday I had a meeting related to the church finances, including our giving deficit (over $20,000 so far in 2005). Today I opened an envelope holding a check that all but eliminated that deficit. We are all stunned.

I seem to be getting better about trusting God's sovereignty in relation to the world. It's a sentiment I don't know if I can capture well. I feel better able to entrust Him with protecting His own reputation, with the hearts and minds of others, with all those things He's said and proved he can be trusted with. It's not nearly as hard to accept His sovereignty in my own life, but I can get bogged in how many things external to me need truth, justice, love, fixing, healing. My response is often something less than compassion.

So I haven't been jumping at any hint of drama, haven't been rushing in to correct any possible error, haven't been banging my head against the wall when people refuse to want to be well (John 5). I will set myself to trust Him with those things. He is faithful. And true compassion will never come while I'm running around trying to be God; it will only come from trusting that He is. And He is.
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