Nothing's as personal as I make it. I'm not sure if that's better or worse.
Stayed in rather than attending the Whiskey Smoke at John's tonight. Just couldn't bring myself to be "on" that long, knowing that tomorrow is also filled until bedtime. Sometimes I wonder if my self with groups is an act, if I fool them all, then quietly resent them for being fooled. If someone really does see, that's when I'm really in trouble. Because that's when I actually care. And that's just not safe.
I'm OK. I just don't want things to be as hard as they are sometimes. I'm tired of the hurt.