Maximillian Amadeus Banzai (banzai) wrote,
Maximillian Amadeus Banzai

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Waking up and growing up

We begin to pout, become irritated with God, and then say, "Oh well, I can’t help it. I prayed and things didn’t turn out right anyway. So I’m simply going to give up on everything." Just think what would happen if we acted like this in any other area of our lives!

Am I fully prepared to allow God to grip me by His power and do a work in me that is truly worthy of Himself? Sanctification is not my idea of what I want God to do for me—sanctification is God’s idea of what He wants to do for me.

Oswald Chambers, My Utmost for His Highest (14 August,"'The Discipline of the Lord'")

No more being a baby about this. I'm tricky with myself—other than outright sin, I resist God's discipline in ways that allow me to cling to a sense of superiority. But it's the same thing, really, and I don't have to peel back much of the veneer to see it. I give up too often. Give up on God, on others, on myself. As one who believes and hopes in the resurrection, that kind of giving up is somewhere on the continuum of silliness and stupidity. I know better, so it's time to stop my immature antics.

I smile when I say that, enjoying the patience and grace of my Lord with me. Infinite mercy.

Ahead today, other than the drying of my laundry, is some Community Group time at the park and housewarming for Beth. Definitely going to the latter; we'll see about the former. We've gotten a bit scattered about our time with Annette and Nate's group every few months, and this time it's such a hodgepodge that I'm not particularly invested. That's OK, I think—I don't need to be the prime mover.

Have so much trouble keeping up with keeping in touch with friends, family, etc. Could be nothing more complex than self-centeredness. How do others do it?

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