—Oswald Chambers, My Utmost for His Highest (15 February, "'Am I My Brother's Keeper?'")
Fun potluck last night at the boys'. Brought the Crunch Berries. Showing of 20 or so, including John, Linn, and the kids. Good to see Nikki, besides the fact that she made the most delicious apple crisp. Ended up center stage with The Funny, not entirely intentionally. Unsure if I'm at ease and being appreciated for who I am in those moments or if I'm hiding. Probably fair measures of each. Quieting down around the fire was my favorite part.
Caught up on some unread Chambers on the bus last night. Great stuff about listening. I suspect that my journal makes it seem as if I'm more devotionally disciplined than I truly am. An honest assessment leaves me embarrassed and humbled, which can't be a bad thing moving forward. I long not only for discipline but also for passion in my pursuit of Him. It ebbs and flows, as is natural, but I want to become unflagging, dogged in that pursuit. I desire desire.
Dreamed that jasonmonster gave me a call to get together. That's pretty cool.
Whatever the reason, my latté is amazing today. Velvety.
Flesh is weak this morning— doesn't want to move and certainly want to serve through the early afternoon. Tired in the bones. No grumbling in my spirit, though; it is good to serve and worship. Will miss it while I'm away next weekend, I think.