calm—Oswald Chambers, My Utmost for His Highest
Recently began (re)reading My Utmost for His Highest as a devotional; its online availability makes it convenient for me to access wherever I am. More and more impressed and convicted with the importance of intercession. When God gives me discernment, this is its purpose. Instead, I often use the gift for criticism, planning, advice giving, and even ridicule. The difference in how His gifts are used by hard and soft hearts is the difference between sin and righteousness.
Woke early, as I have been. God bore me through night and brought me to morning, as He has been. The grace of depending on Him is a dangerous one. There's suffering in it— if there was for Christ, I can expect nothing else. Indeed, I can hope for nothing else— not in a fatalistic sense, but in the truest sense of the joy of sharing in His sufferings. My burdens are not as His were; they are tiny and tainted by sin. But the nature of my suffering is redeemed as I learn to lean on God. His glory is made manifest when I remain in Him.
Feels silly to even think about my struggling in this light, honestly. I'm no martyr.
My days off have been getting better and better. Hoping the trend continues today. Already blessed with cooler temperatures and gray skies. Many don't see it that way, but it's what I'd have chosen this day to be. Read the paper over breakfast this morning, including the sports page. All three are aberrations from my norm.
