August 21st, 2004

Desk

Patience and sacrifices

Grilled basil chicken over linguine, red peppers, squash, and broccoli with an Australian Shiraz is my dinner tonight. I know how to do the bachelor thing right.

I've had unexpected free time since my coffee with Dave and Annette's move were both postponed. As usual, I haven't known what to do with myself, but it's still very good to have the downtime. Haven't felt so hot the whole time, either; could be any number of reasons for that.

Abraham took Isaac to the altar once, had to give him up once, and God came through for him. I find myself having to lay some of the same things down day after day, and I think I resent God for it. My view is narrow—there are doubtless many smaller sacrifices that prepared Abraham for that climax, sacrifices not only of property, but of will and of heart. The story doesn't include the daily detail of his preparation, but there's every reason to believe it's there. A man doesn't give up his son without giving up a thousand other things first. He doesn't do it without faith, or without hope.

I am a man of little faith or patience in my preparation. Waiting is not my thing; letting go is even less so.
  • Current Mood
    restless restless
B-Side

Katy Bowser tomorrow

Abraham put Issac on the altar
For to die, for to die, for to die

One way or another there is beauty for ashes
One way or another we will come alive
One way or another there are crowns, crowns, crowns, crowns
One way or another we all die

—Katy Bowser, "One Way Or Another"



Going to see Katy Bowser at Conor Byrne tomorrow night. She's a singer/songwriter I was introduced to via an email. When I happened to be listening to one of her songs while writing a journal entry in May, she ran across my journal and left me a helpful comment. I think she's friends with jasonmonster and scillymonster as well.

Funny that I should find myself facing the same struggles and questions now as I did then. This journey towards being real is a long one.

So it should be a good show. Any Seattle friends are welcome to join me tomorrow—show is at 9:00 pm with a $5 cover. I'd love to see a show with any or all of you.
  • Current Music
    Katy Bowser, "Novocaine"