May 28th, 2004


Being a Christian without Jesus

Have you ever tried to be a Christian without Jesus? I've been doing that too much. I know the right answers and the deep questions, but my own life has been sucking because I'm not seeking Him personally, not laying things at His feet, not enjoying His rest and living in light of His sovereignty. I try to make my own solutions and deal with my own pain. Being a Christian without Jesus, without His power and His grace, is one of the most miserable things in the world.

And it should be. Thank God it's exhausting and painful. Thank God I become someone I hate when I do it. Thank God I don't have enough in me to keep going. As John said yesterday, when we talked about making idols of good things, "If you're frustrated, it's because God is frustrating you."

Because He loves me. Because He wants to be for me, to be my comfort and the lifter of my head, my strength and shield, my refuge and my fortress, my Savior and Redeemer, my Lord and my Love. Because my Abba wants to form Christ in me.

As fringebenefits said this morning, I'm thankful for new days. Days tend to be used up and dirty by the end. I'm so tired of everything and especially of myself by the end of a day. But today, today is new. This is the day that the Lord has made. I will rejoice and be glad in it.
  • Current Mood
    hopeful hopeful