March 13th, 2004


Merciful struggling

Salvation does not mean merely deliverance from sin or the experience of personal holiness. The salvation which comes from God means being completely delivered from myself, and being placed into perfect union with Him. When I think of my salvation experience, I think of being delivered from sin and gaining personal holiness. But salvation is so much more! It means that the Spirit of God has brought me into intimate contact with the true Person of God Himself. And as I am caught up into total surrender to God, I become thrilled with something infinitely greater than myself.

Oswald Chambers, My Utmost for His Highest (13 March, "God's Total Surrender to Us")

This surrender is still a struggle/challenge, and I'm perhaps most in awe of the fact that I'm invited to surrender to His sovereign love at all. My God, how gracious You are. Catch me up in You.

Talked with Annette, Heather, and Nate at breakfast about loneliness—how difficult it can be and how we can be responsible for continuing to live in it. Nothing comes without investment. You have to show up, at a minimum, and if you aren't doing that, you need to make your peace with the consequences of that choice. Sometimes that's me, but I own it. Choosing to be a victim is irresponsible, sad, and denies the power of the gospel.

My dinner tonight has no meat in it whatsoever. That's just weird.
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    hungry hungry