Maximillian Amadeus Banzai (banzai) wrote,
Maximillian Amadeus Banzai

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Stop requested

The day was full. Worship services through the morning, then a 12:30 congregational meeting. Gave a quick presentation and handout on parliamentary procedure which I'd hoped would both educate and soothe the congregation; the meeting was orderly, so perhaps that played some small part. Locked up the building afterward, which got me home around 15:00. A couple of hours with Star Trek: The Next Generation, a call from my mom, and a much-needed nap, then dinner and time with taci (are you still sick?) and Connor. Came home and Connor ended up staying until just now. Wasn't expecting his company (he was, unknown to me, killing time until picking Sara up from the airport), but it has been a while and I'd been lamenting not having more time with him recently, so there you go.

But I'm tired, still tired, and never seem to have enough time to replenish whatever energy seems constantly drained from me. Perhaps time and rest aren't what I truly need, but I crave them with everything I have. Maybe I fear them, too, somewhere inside. That's when God shows up, and I'm not sure I want to listen to all He might have to say to me, or bear silence.

In any case, now I have moments, a few, and so I write, just a bit, to try to find some ground beneath my feet. That's where they have to be before I can ever find my path, right?

Oh, I wish the world would go away, if only for a day. No questions, no decsions, no expectations, no schedules. If only for a day. Just...stop.

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